Conversations between Generations

Barbara Radtke

I recently heard Kelly Brown Douglas deliver a lecture based on her new book Resurrection Hope: A Future Where Back Lives Matter. It is based on questions that arose in an ongoing conversation she had with her son, a young adult named Desmond. The conversation was one often conducted by texting and she kept the texts to ponder them. In addition to being Desmond’s mother, Kelly Brown Douglas is also a theologian, the dean of a seminary, and the author of The Black Christ and Stand Your Ground: Black Bodies and the Justice of God, a theological reflection on the death of Treyvon Martin. Her son, Desmond, was raising theological questions about hope, despair, and whether Black lives really did matter at the time of the outcry about the death of George Floyd.

This virtual encounter with Kelly Brown Douglas underscored for me the importance of intergenerational dialogue in my life. When I was younger, I got advice from parents, elders, and those respected and recognized in my chosen field. As I aged, I often gave advice as an academic advisor or told stories to those who were younger. It is the intergenerational conversations, however, that stand out in my memory. They are the conversations that began with a stance of openness to learning, of probing the way we framed our questions (often where generational differences surfaced), and of having patience to keep the conversation open-ended. The process was as important as the conclusion and it was best not to draw the conclusion prematurely.

Looking back, I can see where several intergenerational conversations have influenced my thinking. When I was almost 60, It was a conversation with a group of sophomores, mostly 19 years old, who had all grown up watching The Lion King, which began my deep rethinking of what it meant to be human, creature, and part of creation. The impact “Circle of Life” had had on their thinking showed me the implicit influence that the great chain of being had had on mine. I began to change and teach “What does it mean to be human?” differently.

Kathy, in your last blog post “Betty White and Older Women,” your account of engaging with the women in your mother’s high school alum group is an example of the influence intergenerational conversation can have on shaping a world view as a young adult.

In retirement, I do not have ready access to other generations like I did at the university. In the early days of the pandemic, Zooming with my siblings, we were often hosted by a nephew who always brought a refreshing view to our topics, often with a point of view shaped by being in a different generation. As the pandemic hopefully becomes endemic, I realize that I can seek other partners for intergenerational conversations in new places. One place I seem to find them virtually is my local public town library through the programs it sponsors. I am wondering: who are your partners in intergenerational conversation? What value have the conversations had in shaping your world-view today?

A Response from Kathy Hendricks

Barbara, this is a great follow-up to last week’s blog and conversation about the wisdom of older women. I greatly appreciate how you have flipped the topic by describing the way in which you are now gleaning wisdom from younger generations. I know how you respect and enjoy the conversations you have with your nephews, and I can say the same about my nieces. We are mostly in touch through social media and yet I find their observations, posts, and daily doings a great way to broaden my worldview. My son and daughter are cherished sources of inspiration as I watch each of them carry out their work and manage situations that I never had to face. I have learned so much from both of them over the years.

This conversation is also well timed as feedback to Sunday’s Superbowl Half Time show light up the Internet. I have seen a number of “Gen X vs. Millennials vs. Boomers” posts that make me wonder why we can’t be more generous towards one another. One of the great things I appreciate about you, Barbara, is the way in which you remain so open to others and respectful of their views. In your own way, you are helping to close the generational gap. I also look forward to hearing from our readers about their cross-generational experiences and conversations.